Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
