she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
