Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
