i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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