I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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