what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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