the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
She bit a glass in half.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
And then my night got REAL pukey
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
