explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I lost the right to judge tonight
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Randomize
