All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I could fuck to npr.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
