Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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