Define "chronic" masturbator.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Randomize
