i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
