i always forget guys have bellybuttons
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
