i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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