They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
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