You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
