I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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