He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
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