Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
