Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
