THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize