We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
We've started traveling with Michael and Patrick so we can pretend we're two legit straight couples.
A charade that fell apart the second another couple on the cruse found Sarah face down in my box on an observation deck.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
