Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
