the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
