we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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