There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
we found you in the kitchen at five am trying to make a vodka omelette. you said you didn't want to live in a world where your two favourite things couldn't be together.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Damn victory sex feels great
Randomize