theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Randomize
