walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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