I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize