I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I skipped work to stalk him.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
no you cant smoke seaweed
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
