I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize
