yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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