Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
You need a sexual gate keeper
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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