I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
