He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
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