hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
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