People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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