he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
