I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I am mentally ready for anal.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
