If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
