On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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