What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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