What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
