I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I lost the right to judge tonight
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Randomize
