everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
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