She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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