I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
