someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
