You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
