I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize